Daughter's Betrothal

Why do you wish to marry your daughter? What drives you in this venture? 

I see you being anxious and hurrying in your efforts to find your daughter a groom? Why this hurriedness, is this out of love for her or out of peer pressure and self-interest? 

Over the years, I have found you and mother making wrong investments. Most of your investments backfire and failed to bring fortune and happiness to the family. It is not as if you are downright a failure in your ventures, but you fail to produce the desired results for whatever reasons. In the light of these facts, I find myself not completely trusting your attitude while undertaking this new quest. You fail to assure me, and whether you choose to disregard my doubts over your credence, I would not back off from commenting over your efforts, this is the only thing I can do under the boundaries of my social status. 

Answer me, what do you look for in the guy and his family? Is it how materially well-off they are? Or how do they come across socially? Or how is the guy’s overall appearance?

What exactly are the things you would like in the guy and his family? What do you desire out of this marriage? What kind of future do you want for your daughter?

I would like you to stop here and think and write about these things in detail. 

For I would like to answer these questions. 

What I would like in the guy and his family..............

I would like them to be firstly financially sound. So much so that, their lives and decisions are not solely governed by the need to seek money, they should be secure in that respect. When a family or individual or a society struggle financially, all their efforts are inclined towards the fulfilment of that longing and, in my experience, and whatever wisdom I could collect by rummaging through different sources, chasing financial stability keeps an entity in the realms of hunger and greed. I would not like my sister to live most of her life in such engagements.

If the family is right in the mind in this regard then I would like them to be a family of strong morale. People with vision, chasing something greater than their survival. A family/individual which/who is driven by strong morale, produce people of great character. These are families which produce kings and queens, they are not followers but those who command the power to design the world. 

I want my sister to be a part of such a family. I want her to be lucky enough to not be a part of a family that is lusting 'power' but driven by the quest of art and culture. A family where people and individuals seek wisdom over 'power', skills over luxury and expression over seduction. I want my sister to be part of a family that commands respect from even those who are corrupt and who associate with people with similar principles and substance. 

What I desire from this marriage................

I desire the continuation of a legacy of positivity. If I seek only assurance for myself that I successfully married her off, it would be an escapism on my behalf. I don’t just have a responsibility towards her, I also have a responsibility towards mankind. I want people to give away their daughters as a weapon of great virtue to those who deserve such a force? I don’t want to trade her off for the sake of my relief, I want to carry this burden as a chance to redeem this society of evil, and I trust my sister to be an individual of great strength, who if given the right circumstances, would continue to become an unstoppable force, and I want her to get a family which recognizes the potential inside her. Not a family of mere followers who seek material fulfilment but a family that knows the value of everything and has the potential of creating individuals of great character. 

What kind of future I want for my sister.........?

I see her future as the future of humanity itself. What decisions we make now may look meaningless but if the world as a whole is doomed then it is because of the wrong set of people who are getting empowered and the reason behind their empowerment is that they have the required resources thus strengthening evil further. We as parents and guardians are only emotionally concerned with our immediate family but we fail to see the larger picture thus further narrowing our vision. I want you to look at your daughter as the continuation of your strong legacy. And then when you look out for a suitable match for her, I want you to feel proud of your own virtues, because only positivity, strength and magnanimity respect and recognize positivity, strength and magnanimity. It might take a lot of time, the longer it takes to respect and discover your own inner worth, the longer it would take for such strong families and individuals to emerge in your environment. It might take longer, but then I guess hurrying this decision will not break the negative karmic cycle of our family. Allow your daughter to become such a strong force, maybe eventually you might come to know that she has herself found a prince suitable for her. I know this path probably looks a dangerous one, but what good are Gohonzon and a strong faith if it can’t even accomplish this.